• The feeling of being Out of Control/Balance
• Step Back
• Get a Routine or Change it
• Move
• Sleep
• Change What You Eat
• Change Your Environment
• DeClutter
• Summary
• Resources

The feeling of being Out of Control/Balance

Is this you? Feeling like you are in a rut, doing the same thing day in and day out, feeling irritated, never enough time, family and work getting on your nerves? You may be feeling out of control of your life, or feeling like your life is off balance. In this article, you will learn 7 ways to take back control and why making these changes (whether big or small), will enhance your life balance and those around you.

Step Back

It’s okay, not to be okay. So take a Pause. If you have lost the balance in your life, now is the time to Stop and Step back.

If you are saying you don’t have enough time to step back, then you could be setting yourself up for a rude awakening. Your body will make you stop if you don’t take the time to reassess your lifestyle.

What is going on in your current situation now that you have taken this moment to step back? Are you grieving the loss of a loved one? Laid off from a job or going to a job you despise? Fighting constantly with family? There could be any number of reasons you feel this way and one of the first steps is to understand what is happening in your current situation. 

Let’s map out your day-to-day routine. Write out what basically happens in a day. Most of us typically follow the same schedule but just think about what happens specifically to you and what you have to do for others. 

Which areas or items get under your skin? And please don’t say other people! Even though they could play a factor, you can’t change other people (especially adults). You can only change what you do and how you react to situations.

Got it written down? No need to share your list with others, this is for you. This is a way to get all that has been trapped in your mind down on pen and paper (or digitally if you so choose).

Get a Routine or Change it

There are benefits to having a structure in your life. There is less ambiguity, and less to think about which gives you more mental capacity to tackle more strenuous areas of your life. 

For example, taking out the stress of figuring out what to eat by planning 4-5 days worth of meals will lessen your anxiety level of the big “what are we going to eat” question. 

When you have a routine, you also can accept or reject outside requests for your time because you know exactly what you have time for. If you have a group fitness class 3 times a week, you know you are committed during that time and can easily reject an invitation without having to feel the guilt of saying No.

You don’t have to have every single minute planned out. Doing that can be exhausting by itself. However, start with a morning routine. The way your start your day plays a lot into how the rest of your day will go. If you start out with chaos, it will get worse as the day goes on.

Check out The Miracle Morning on ways to transform your morning routine and bring positive change in your life. And while you are at it, sip some lemon water before breaking into that coffee.

But let’s set you already have a routine or a structure to your day/week. Maybe it’s a little too rigid or you have been doing the same thing for the last 10 years and it’s more out of habit or obligation.

Are you the person that can’t say “No” to anyone or any project? Have you been on the same committee of a local group or just going through the motions?

Every other Monday at 7pm, you have to drive across town for a pointless 2-hour meeting that doesn’t accomplish anything that couldn’t be done over an email. If that is you, and you’re tired of it but keep forging ahead, it may be time for your to shake your routine up. 

Doing something brand new or stopping some of the old habits will bring a new spark into your life. Give yourself something new to look forward to. How do you feel when you have a new trip scheduled and it’s almost time to go? Your whole attitude changes. 

But you can’t go on a new trip (or maybe you can), every week so what else can you do to switch up your routine. If it no longer brings you joy and just the thought of doing a task irritates you, it’s time to let it go. Not sure how to do that? Check out The Power of No. It will provide great insight into the best way forward. 

Move

You’ve heard it all before. Daily exercise helps generate endorphins, which basically makes you feel good. But nobody said you needed to do hard-core CrossFit or train for a marathon. Just some regular walking is a great start. And the older you get, the better the walking will feel as opposed to the strenuous workouts.

Work your way up to several times a week for 20-30 mins each time. Another great workout is incorporating yoga into your routine. The flexibility you will gain will make other workouts you decide to try easier. 

Any movement, whether you like walking, yoga, boxing, or swimming (just to name a few) will give you the energy to take control of your life. Physical activity promotes brain health. 

Why care about brain health? Because brain health helps people thrive within the context of their personal life. And if we put two and two together, low brain health is a factor in why your life is out of balance.

Sleep

There is a saying, “I can sleep when I’m dead” that too many people in our world live by especially if they are trying to build businesses or they feel there is too much going on in their world to afford the luxury of sleep.

Don’t let that saying ruin how you get balance in your life. It’s likely why you feel out of sorts. How much sleep you need is different for everyone, but you still need to try and stay consistent with what that number is. 

So why is sleep so important? You’ve heard how it can repair your body and gives you the energy needed for the next day right? But how does this pertain to maintaining balance in your life? With good sleep, you can problem-solve and make better decisions in your life.

The decisions we make can have lasting effects. 

Remember that Cosby episode when Clare was so exhausted that she signed a rental agreement for Theo without even reading it (and she was the lawyer)? A few seconds later she realized what she did and had to rectify the situation.

Ever put on two different pairs of shoes or two different socks and then realize a few hours later they aren’t matching? Well, this example may not be as detrimental to you but signing something and not being fully coherent when reading an important document is. 

If you like to stay up late, try to get in at least 7 hours before you do something the next day. Find a schedule that works for you and be consistent. Also, try reading before bed instead of browsing your phone before you go to sleep. You’ll feel better rested the next day? Don’t believe it, try and find out.

Change what you eat

You are what you eat. Remember that saying? This can be a sticky subject as in some parts of the world, access to food is not as easy as just going 5 mins away to a fully stocked grocery store. And with the way food costs are rising, sometimes the cheapest items are not the best for you.

But what do you do? Do the best you can. When you know better you do better. 

How many times a week are you eating Fast Food? The food served is convenient, but 9 times out of 10, it’s not providing the nutritional value you need to be as productive as you can be.

I mean when they advertise 2 for $5 and then put the great marketing commercials out there, it’s tough to just ignore.

But you can when you realize that the foods you are eating could make you feel out of control of your life.

When you feel anxious and depressed, take inventory of what foods you have been eating. Go ahead, write it down. It’s probably a mix of fried food, red meats, processed foods like microwave dinners, cookies, caffeinated drinks, and alcoholic beverages.

Eating foods such as processed meats, high sugar foods, caffeine, and alcohol, which provide little nutritional value, have been associated with more psychiatric symptoms and can increase cortisol levels—our primary hormone responsible for stress.

I’m not saying you have to be 100% clean eating all the time, but do you need to have a soft drink for every meal? (And diet drinks are just as bad).

Clean eating is not as hard as we make it. Especially if done in stages. Start with what you drink in the morning. Water and lemon versus coffee. Fruit versus a danish. Making your own sandwich with fresh vegetables instead of grabbing a burger and fries.

Take it one day at a time and you’ll see the difference which how you feel daily.

Change your environment

How long have you been where you currently live? 5 years, 10 years, your whole life? There is certainly nothing wrong with staying in one place for an extended period of time. However, if your attitude has been off and you can’t figure out why then you may want to look at your environment. 

Do you feel sick every Sunday night because you have to go to the office the next day? Or every time you go somewhere there is drama mainly because the locals have nothing better to do in your small community. 

Feeling this way, day in and day out does not help you mentally and physically. You can change what you see and where you live. 

Maybe move to the other side of town if you can’t at the moment leave your current area. Or finding a new position within the same company. However, the more drastic the change, the more drastic the change will happen within you.

Moving away opens up more opportunities. You get a chance to expand your social and business network in addition to having that “starting over” point. No one knows your history so you can improve yourself without someone from your past always bringing up the past.

Changing your environment can also increase your dopamine levels. What is dopamine? 

What is dopamine? Dopamine is made in your brain and acts as a chemical messenger, communicating messages between nerve cells in your brain and your brain and the rest of your body. 

New experiences increase your dopamine level. Why is that important? Because high levels of dopamine can produce a greater sense of self-control, and increase productivity, and motivation. 

Think of it as a kick in the pants to get you back on track in your life.

DeClutter

Maybe a fresh start does not mean a new home but instead cleaning out your current home. It could be time to remove the negative energy in your space. 

To make room for the new, you have to get rid of the old. Somehow the world just works that way. 

Do you have just random junk in your house for no apparent reason other than it’s just always been there? Why though? This extra stuff in your house and space could be holding you back from something greater. When you have a clear space to work and think, typically your work reflects that versus your brain getting overwhelmed with everything it sees.

There is a great book by Mari Kondo called The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up. This book will help you change your home into a space of serenity and inspiration. 

Clutter harms your mental health so removing the clutter will improve this part of your life. How do you feel when you come home to a house that is clean and full of zen versus when you go into a house where you can barely walk without tripping over something? 

Go ahead, take one room at a time as this type of task can be very tiring, but also very rewarding. How would you feel by giving away stuff you no longer need and use, to people that can use it? There is a good feeling that comes with that too. 

Use this as a catalyst to find the balance in your life to start achieving the goals that you set forth.

Summary

As you review this list, start with 1 or 2 areas to prepare for a balanced life. These changes can produce a better work life balance, healthy boundaries, and personal growth. Don’t let burnout of life take you down. Carve out some personal time and focus on getting the balance set in your life.

Don’t wait, start today!

Resources

Olsson, R. (2021,September 21).Can Certain Foods Increase Stress and Anxiety?[Blog post]. Retrieved from https://www.bannerhealth.com/healthcareblog/better-me/can-certain-foods-increase-stress-and-anxiety 

Mental Health Daily (2015, April 1). High Dopamine Levels: Symptoms & Adverse Reactions [Blog post]. Retrieved from https://mentalhealthdaily.com/2015/04/01/high-dopamine-levels-symptoms-adverse-reactions

Cleveland Clinic (2022, December 25). Dopamine: What is it, Function & Symptoms [Blog post]. Retrieved from https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/articles/22581-dopamine

The post 7 Ways to Find Balance in your Life first appeared on Angela P. Banks.