Life Can Be Funny

It’s funny how you can plan everything out, but then life has a different path. Last year my husband and I decided that we were not renewing our lease in our current apartment, but wanted to move and get a bigger place. Our thought was to get a townhome within a 5-mile radius. I was finally getting a separate office, more space to entertain, and not deal with the nuisances that come with being in an apartment.

So we made this decision around May of 2023. Every month the countdown was on. And then in December, we received the letter to renew, so with that, we put in our notice to vacate. That left us about 3 full months to secure a new place.

We assumed renting a townhome or a single-family home would be the same as renting an apartment. But it felt more like buying a house. Working with realtors, sending in documentation, waiting to see if you were selected. That process took about 1-2 weeks each time we found a place we seemed to like.

Then about a week before our lease was up we made the decision to renew our current lease because it was still available. After all the disappointments, we felt like it was God’s way of saying “Not right now”. So with that, I had to find a way to make the current place seem like we were moving into a new place. Hence, the reorganizing and decluttering took place.

Getting Organized

I focused on two main areas for the decluttering; the primary walk-in closet and kitchen. After focusing on those areas, I spent some time with a hall closet and the second bathroom closet.

We have lived in our current apartment for a little over 3 years. We moved during the pandemic from a different state. In previous moves we have had the ability to take our time and move over the course of a few weeks to a month. This time, we needed to move everything to a truck and drive.

So with the help of family, we moved in and put everything in place quickly without too much thought. The walk-in closet wasn’t a total mess, but it was not optimized. We share a closet with our own sides but then add in the linen, random electronics, luggage storage and more, it can get cluttered quickly.

You can’t organized without getting rid of some stuff. And that’s what I did. If I had not used it in over a year, I got rid of it. Here are the items I donated or took to the dump:

• Clothes/Shoes/Belts
• Purses
• Small Carryon Suitcases
• Foot Massager
• Pillows
• Blankets
• Bookbags/Totes
• Old Towels
• Paintings

Now that I had a little more real estate to work with, I took everything out of the closet (except the clothes that were hanging up) to the bedroom and only took back in what was needed. I figured out what “spaces” I needed.

For the shelves, I had these areas

• Towels/Washcloths
• Linen
• Office Supplies
• Important Papers
• Travel Accessories
• Jewelry
• Eye Care and Makeup
• First Aid and Medicine

There is top shelfing so that is where I included items that I don’t need on a regular basis.

• Photos/Albums
• Extra Blankets
• Hats/Scarfs
• Purses

On the middle shelf I have baskets for mainly clothing specific items.

• Socks
• Fitness attire
• Swimsuits

The bottom section I put the bigger items that wouldn’t fit anywhere else.

• Laundry
• Golf Clubs
• Shoes
• Luggage
• Tote of books and paperwork

I purchased another long tote for additional books and photo albums that I didn’t have the space to display. These are placed underneath the bed in the bedroom.

Here are some of my before and after pictures.

I did buy an additional organizer that most people use underneath their kitchen or bathroom sink cabinets, but I found an additional way to use it in the empty spot. I added my medicine and first aid stash.

Here is an amazon link to the under sink organizer.

The Kitchen Semi MakeOver

Now that I was happy with how the closet turned out, I could divert my attention to the kitchen. Let me say that I did not do this all in one day. I took one day for the closet, one for the kitchen and another for the smaller areas with the two bathrooms.

One area that I wanted organization around was my spice cabinet. My turn style caddy did not fit all my spices. I had ordered a spice rack that could fit in my current cabinet. I did have to move a shelf up one notch to have it fit, but it was perfect. The rack held 20 spices.

Similar to how I did the closet, I took everything out of the cabinet, cleaned it and put back only what I needed. I was embarrassed by the amount of spices I had in the back of the cabinet from 2022. The longest part of this organization was cleaning the new spice rack, labeling, and emptying what I had in the current containers into the new ones. There was some leftovers, so I put those either behind it or above. Now finding my spices is a breeze.

Here is an amazon link to my spice rack. Check out the before and after pics below.

The second area that needed attention was the bottom of my kitchen island. It was a catchall for cleaning supplies, random kitchen gadgets, face masks and a sewing machine. My vision was to only see pots/pans and have an area to store vegetables and bakery items.

I had two sets of pots and pans, so I donated one. Similar to how I started the areas, I removed everything from the bottom of the kitchen island and only put back what I needed. For the pots and pans I purchased an organizer that would fit. It works but I think I could have ordered one that was more sturdier. This allowed me to have more cabinet space for can goods and pasta.

The cabinets are still a work in progress as I still need to purchase some additional pasta containers, but I love the fact that I can see everything and not have to hunt for it in my own kitchen.

Here are a few additional organization after pics that I was able to do for the cabinets underneath the sinks and the pantry. I love the fact that everything is more visible.

Zen

When there is organization and less clutter, I’m able to breath. I can concentrate better in other areas of focus. I work from home so being able to be in an environment that is calming allows me to focus on work tasks. Being in an apartment, space is limited, but when you declutter and give everything its own space, the small footprint expands.

I hope I’ve been able to give you some tips or ideas on how to organize some of the pain point areas in your home. If you would like to read about other areas of tranquility, try starting here to view additional posts.

~Angela

The post Decluttering Can Bring the Peace you Need first appeared on Angela P. Banks.

These days all you hear about are plant-based foods or going vegan or vegetarian (yes, they are two different things). I mean with the chicken that can be made in a lab, who can blame people for wanting to find healthier ways of eating? My journey (along with my husband) started at the end of 2019.

What Started It All

We had just returned from a Bermuda cruise with our friends and I was feeling like a true glutton. I mean, things I typically wouldn’t do regularly, like eating a hamburger and fries at midnight with a side of dessert were pretty common on that 7-day trip. 

Needless to say, when we came back from the trip I was ready for some type of detox. I recall hearing about a special online called “Game Changers” and how it was about the effects of going plant-based. So we watched the special and had some eye-opening revelations. So after that day, things changed in our household.

The first couple of months were more of a discovery phase. When we went to our favorite restaurants we had to figure out what type of meatless dish to get. I noticed that I was getting a lot of food with pasta, rice, and fries.

After getting tired of the same foods, we added seafood to our regular routine. Typically it was salmon, shrimp, or tuna dishes. Not every day, but a few times a week. Plus when we went to restaurants or had friends invite us over for dinner, it was something to add as another option. 

What Would People Say

That brings me to another point. After we mentioned we stopped eating certain foods, our family and friends would routinely ask, “What do you eat again”? “Or can you eat this?”. I appreciate the thoughts that others have regarding our dietary choices, but I never wanted them to feel like they needed to bend over backward to accommodate our needs. 

For holidays, there were usually enough sides to choose from and still have a full meal. One of the benefits I felt during the holidays was that I didn’t overindulge like previously. The feeling of needing to just sit and not move is not something I enjoy at this stage of my life. I was never a big meat eater in the first place, however, I do miss the taste of fried chicken.

It’s a Process

Every once in a while I will have a chicken leg, but it still doesn’t taste like it used to. Food generally doesn’t taste like it used to, but that’s a topic for a different day.

One thing I noticed, especially during the earlier part of the pandemic was that my grocery bill was less because I bought more vegetables. However, there are some “plant-based” meats out there that cost just as much as regular meat. I buy some of the Impossible burgers or sausage but I don’t like to eat them daily. Even though it’s not made of real meat, there are still a lot of preservatives and other ingredients used to create the product. 

In the last year, the Instagram community has been a lifesaver for me. The way the foods are presented looks amazing. I’ve followed several vegan, vegetarian, and plant-based influencers and I’ve been able to create different dishes easily and within an hour or so.

Many of the dishes incorporate tofu, tempeh, chickpeas, and mushrooms, but I haven’t been bored with my options. And I can tell that my body enjoys these options better than what I used to eat in the past.

I stopped Labeling Myself

That’s why I keep eating this way. I won’t say I’m fully vegan or vegetarian but I prefer plant-based meals. My body digests these foods easier and I feel more energetic. 

If you are thinking of making a similar transition, just try it out and see how it feels for you. You are not obligated to declare your “food” choices for the whole world. Because each day may be different.

When we were in South Africa, I tried meat a few times because I heard it was better than what we eat in the States. I stopped labeling myself with my food choices, but I like to say I prefer certain foods over others.

If you want a list of 5 meals I make regularly, sign up below to download my 5 quick recipes.

The post Why I Went Semi Plant-Based and How I Did It first appeared on Angela P. Banks.

2024 is here! I don’t know about you but 2023 flew by. Every time I turned around it was a new month. Sometimes it went so fast I was trying to catch up with meeting my goals. 

One of the goals I set for myself was to read 12 books in a year, which would have been about a book per month. Some I finished quicker than others. 

Are you looking for some book recommendations?  Here are 12 books that I completed throughout 2023. May these inspire you for your reading goals in 2024.

These books were a combination of supporting authors I knew, business, spiritual growth, and writing.

I will link to each of these and give you my thoughts about each book below. 

1. The Purpose and Power of Authority – Miles Monroe
2. Bounded by Love – Rev Damone Paul Johnson
3. On Writing – Stephen King
4. Black to Ghana – Charleslisa DeJesus
5. Better Not Perfect – Dr. Shai Butler
6. Peaks & Valleys – Spencer Johnson
7. Woman Up! – Aimee Cohen
8. The Power of Awareness – Neville Goddard
9. From the Trash Man to the Cash Man – Myron Golden
10. Nothing is Missing – Nicole Walters
11. Two Weeks Notice – Amy Porterfield
12. you² – Price Prichard
13. The Bible (Bonus)

I started 2023 with what many others seek to find. What is my purpose? And I will tell you that it’s typically not in any book. I’ve looked. But it’s more of what you captured as you go through a book about finding your purpose.

The Purpose and Power of Authority focused on your Personal Authority Profile and had you look into 12 areas to understand your purpose. It took me about 2-3 months to complete this book because I wanted to work through the questions with thought. At the end of it, I came away with a summary of my authority. This helped guide my focus for the rest of the year, 

In keeping with a spiritual theme, I continued with a new book that was released by a former pastor of mine, Dr. Damone Johnson. Bounded by Love provides you with biblical stories around love and how you can use those in your day-to-day life. 

Earlier in 2023, one goal was to focus more on writing and improving that skill set. So after researching, I came across On Writing by Stephen King. I knew of his movies but I had no idea the plethora of books he had written over the years. The first part gave me the background to the legend himself such as his upbringing and early writing years. The second part was geared toward writing techniques but in a book format. 

If you have read any previous blogs, you would have seen several posts regarding my trip to South Africa in March of 2023. Soon after we returned, a good friend, Charleslisa DeJesus, published a book about her recent trip and experience to Ghana. The timing was perfect to read about another country in Africa. Black to Ghana, gives tips and knowledge regarding how to travel to Ghana. 

In keeping with my theme of knowing the actual author, a fellow church member had published a book as well. Better Not Perfect by Dr. Shai Butler was based on her story from childhood to adulthood. It’s based on not having to focus on always being perfect and what happened when being perfect was at the forefront of her life. A great read for anyone needing to stop with a perfectionism mindset.

Peaks and Valleys took me about 2-3 hours. It’s from the same author who wrote Who Moved My Cheese. The main character in this book gets solid advice from a successful man and helps him navigate through a difficult time in his life. Life will throw you some curve balls, but how you handle it will be the key.

I purchased Woman Up several years ago but never read it until this past year. This talks about 7 reasons why you sabotage your success. I felt like it was directed toward a woman who is navigating the corporate ladder versus being a solopreneur or entrepreneur. However, there are good nuggets to help anyone succeed in business or on their regular job. 

Getting back into more of a spiritual realm, the Power of Awareness was geared toward being aware of your thoughts and how those thoughts can become reality. This was harder to get into. It probably took me longer to read because there were many times when I would read a sentence or two and then realize I wasn’t sure what I had just read. So I would re-read the same area to understand. You need to read every word to make sure you don’t miss the point.

For the last year, I’ve been following Myron Golden’s YouTube channel and gaining lots of insight and knowledge about wealth using biblical principles. So when I saw he had authored books I decided to invest in one of them. From the Trash Man to the Cash Man gives you the building blocks to start from the beginning and build wealth. It was written around 2007, so some examples relating to technology may be a bit dated, but there is still pertinent information to set you up for success.

Nothing is Missing by Nicole Walters was one of my favorite reads of this year. I could not put this book down. I have been a follower and customer of Nicole’s for a while so to get the backstory on her life as a child and through adulthood raising adopted children was inspirational. The message for me was that you have everything you need right now to do amazing things with your life.

If you are ready to create a digital course for your business, check out Amy Porterfield’s book, Two Weeks Notice. It is a comprehensive view of everything you need to get started. No matter the size of the course you want to create, Amy’s book has the foundation that you need to get started. It also contains a workbook-style approach so you can get your ideas and processes in order. 

Another short read is you² by Price Pritchett. There are 18 principles to follow to level up your life. If you are playing too small, then it will take you longer to get where you need to go. Be bold and make quantum leaps to get to success faster. If you need a quick guide to get started on your reading journey, this is it.

And as a bonus book, which I’m still in the process of reading all the way through, is the Holy Bible. My goal was to read the entire Bible in a year. I did not meet that goal, but as of the time of this writing, I made it to Jeremiah which is more than halfway. You’d be surprised how you can elevate yourself just by doing a daily reading of the bible. I did a segment in a post about what happens if you read the Bible 4 times a week based on a study.

These were books that were either suggested or some that I came upon because of where I was at in my personal growth. I hope this list gives you a starting point if there are certain goals you are looking to obtain for 2024.

The post 12 books 1 year: Growing My Mind first appeared on Angela P. Banks.

Are you searching for something, but not sure what it is? Are you feeling stagnant in relationships, a career, or even finances? This could be the time that you start to look inward and develop a personal development plan for yourself. 

If you say that you don’t like to read or there is not enough time for you to add that to your day, then don’t worry because you are not alone. However, if you want to make changes in your life and don’t know where to start, then it’s time for you to invest in yourself and make space for it.

Personal Development

What is personal development? Well for starters, it’s not something that is a 3-week course. It’s a lifelong process. And the more you learn, the more you realize you don’t know as much as you thought you did. 

Personal development is self-improvement in various aspects of your life and is typically gained through reading books or listening to speakers who have insight on the subject at hand.

I’ve been on my personal development journey for at least 15 years so I’ll share below how I got started.  In this post, I give you why and how I started on my journey so that it can help you as you start yours.

“The only journey is the journey within.”—Rainer Maria Rilke

Who Moved My Cheese

If you are new to personal development, you may not have heard of a book called “Who Moved My Cheese” by Spencer Johnson. It’s an interesting title for a book, but it’s relevant because the main actors are four mice.

Mice you say? Yes. But we won’t focus on the fact they are rodents, but the lives they were living.  I was introduced to this book by my husband several years ago and very early in our marriage. Let me tell you about where I was mentally at this time in my life.

I was about 27 years old and I had been at my government job for at least 3-4 years as a full-time employee. I’d worked there part-time while being a college student, so probably 8 years total. As you can imagine, I was working with colleagues who had been there 20, 30, and even 40 years. At that time, having a government job was what we call a “secure” or “good” job.

But the security was dangling over my head and so was about 400 hours of Sick Leave and 120 of Annual Leave. I liked the people that I worked with, but I was not happy in the environment. It seemed like everywhere I turned, someone was unhappy. And I just didn’t know if I could stay there for 30+ years of my life. 

So, back to the book. My husband told me to read this book. It was about 70 pages and looked like an easy read. Now I had never done any leisure reading other than Sweet Vally High and the Baby Sitter’s Club (Yes I’m dating myself). Once I left college, I didn’t have the energy to just read for the fun of it unless it was a magazine.

I finished the book in about 2-3 hours. It was an easy read (which is why I recommend it for newbies). It brought to light what I was feeling. Like I was scared to change and what would happen if I didn’t. I won’t spoil it for you, but let’s just say 2 mice figured it out and the other mice kept reliving Groundhog Day.

Needless to say, that book was the catalyst I needed to start applying for jobs and updating my skills. A few months later I secured a different job where I was in a much better place mentally.

Personal development is about changing yourself. I didn’t do a complete 180 degrees just because of this book, but it started the movement because it was easy to read and understand from a mouse’s point of view. 

Zig, Jim, and Les

These 3 character names are legends in the realm of personal development. But let me tell you their full names. Zig Ziglar, Jim Rohn, and Les Brown. 

It’s funny how you can be around certain things, but until you’re ready to receive it, you may not even notice it’s there. My husband was more advanced in his personal development journey than I was. He had already listened to these 3 speakers multiple times, but in my early years, it just wasn’t a priority for me.

I can’t recall if he introduced me or if it was the MLM I was a part of at the time that led me to that path. A few years after I had started a new position, something happened on the job that made me want to pursue another source of income.

So I joined a fitness MLM. Now say what you want about MLMs, one of the best things I took away from it was the personal development aspect. And there was my quest to listen to different speakers. So you can’t say personal development without hearing Zig Ziglar and Jim Rohn. 

What I liked about their presentation in their recordings, is that I felt like I could become more. The positive mindset they portrayed and their delivery was something I didn’t mind listening to in the car or just cleaning the house.  

Great for new learners on their personal development journey. 

Les Brown is more current (and still alive as of this writing). His jovial personality and upbringing can make you feel that if he can do it, you can do it. And sometimes that’s all we need is the push to get started. Check out some of his recordings on YouTube to get the full effect. 

Now of course there are hundreds of great personal development coaches and leaders and podcasts out there, but if you are new to this, I’d recommend starting with these 3. You can’t go wrong. 

The Bible

Now if you just met me, then let me tell you that I am a believer in God. However, it wasn’t until recently that I decided to take on actually reading the Bible from Genesis to Revelation. My goal at the beginning of the year was to read the Bible in a year. 

Now I will say that for complete understanding, please consult with a better authority figure because I’m still understanding a lot of it myself.  But there is a reason I have this as a good start to personal and spiritual development. 

Something I have noticed over the past year has been a change in how I think about life, people, and circumstances. I wish I had started daily readings several years ago.

According to a study published by the Center of Bible Engagement, there are many benefits to reading your Bible only four times a week. For example, getting drunk decreases by 49%.

I’m not saying you are going to understand every single word but there are a lot of gems in there to help you in your journey for personal growth. Myron Golden, a successful entrepreneur and business owner often relates his teachings to passages in the bible.

As Myron says, if you want to be successful, use the Bible as your guide.

Journaling

One of the last items I want to mention is the concept of journaling. Now this isn’t a particular resource to gain from like a book or podcast, but it is a resource to pour into. When you are reading or listening to something that has given you an aha moment, jot it down. 

You’ll be surprised what you write down when you come back to it a week, month, or even a year later. You’ve heard at some point that writing down your goals helps you meet them. Writing down positive affirmations and tips to help you in life will make you remember them more when you need them the most.

Start Now

Now it’s your turn to start investing in yourself. This type of self-care may not be a trip to a day spa but you are starting the journey to care for your mental well-being.

If you need another good reason to start, check out Tom Corley’s research. He is the author of Change Your Habits, Change Your Life. He spent years studying the habits of wealthy people.

A couple of takeaways from that study were that 55% of wealthy people read for personal development and 63% listen to audiobooks on their commute. Why not start today to be part of that percentage?

Once you get started, you’ll never want to stop and watch your life take on a new direction and meaning. Now go pick one to start!

If you liked this post, check out my writing on having an Abundance Mindset.

The post Unlocking Growth: 4 Newbie Tips to Begin Your Personal Development Journey first appeared on Angela P. Banks.

When you think of the word abundance what comes to mind? More than enough, overflowing, or plentiful? Well, it’s certainly not scarcity. Abundance is a large quantity of something or having more than what you need. 

When we think about an abundance mindset, it is the belief that there are enough resources in the world for everyone – and of being grateful for whatever the universe provides.

if you come from a place of struggle or a place of just making ends meet, it’s hard to understand an abundance mindset because you may not have seen your life play out that way. Always looking at it from the outside can take on a different perspective when it’s always someone else who gets to enjoy their abundance.

By being closed-minded to this approach you are shutting yourself off from your blessings. If you feel others will receive a promotion, a new car, or a new relationship, but not you, then that’s a limited or scarcity mindset. 

Our minds are powerful. If you keep telling yourself whatever you want will never come to pass, then it will never happen. The world is limitless. Ideas are limitless. Money is limitless.

Get yourself on the right trajectory of life. If you are surrounded by family and friends who are always complaining about the lack thereof, then find some new friends and limit your family time with those individuals. 

Grow your knowledge. Read a book, listen to a podcast, feed your soul, and work on your mind. Stop saying phrases like “I’m broke” or “I won’t ever be able to afford that”. Speak life into yourself and any words that come out of your mouth. If you keep saying you are broke, then you will be broke.

Check out this video from Myron Golden on Abundance. You don’t lack Abundance, you lack Awareness. If you have never listened to personal development videos, you can start now.

Also, be grateful for the little things. If you receive a refund check for $5, then cash it. How will you be blessed with the big things if you aren’t grateful for the small things? 

Every morning when you wake up, write down 5 things that you are grateful for. It can be having the ability to get out of bed without being sick or the fact that you are still employed when so many people have just lost their jobs. 

An abundance mindset does not always have to revolve around money. Having an abundance of quality friends to share ideas with or an abundance of quality clients that come into your business establishment to request your services can be just as amazing as unlimited income. 

The next time you sit down remember to internalize that feeling and mindset to set you on your way. You’ll be surprised what can happen in your day to day just by adjusting your attitude.

Every day won’t be a walk in the park. However, starting your day off with the right mindset can change your whole outlook on what happens throughout your life.

If you found this helpful, check out 7 ways to get balance in your life.

The post Having an Abundance Mindset for an improved life. first appeared on Angela P. Banks.

Have you ever been in a situation where you were anxious and nervous about the outcome? You may have had a deadline for a school assignment, or you were working on a project at work and you were on the hook to make the system work.

 Your gut starts feeling queasy. Maybe you get stress headaches. Or even start having dreams about how you will solve the problem. But whatever it is, it seems to consume all your thoughts.

This happened to me several times, but one event stands out. I was working on software configuration to make our company chat functionality more versatile with the global regions. And the SaaS software I was working with had this particular feature.  I was on the hook to figure it out. 

Of course, there was documentation on how the feature worked, but I had to map out and design the best configuration. I lamented about this for weeks. One day in the shower, my lightbulb moment happened. It’s probably because I had been reviewing this scenario for a while, so I finally got a revelation on how to solve it, or at least a way to start. 

Now the solution worked which was such a sigh of relief. I look back and think did I stress over nothing because now the company moved on and it’s not as big of a priority as it once was? Funny how that happens. 

During that time, doubt was front and center. Doubt makes us think we aren’t capable. Doubt makes us second-guess ourselves. Doubt makes us believe it’s time to quit and let someone else handle it. 

But somehow it all works out, it all comes together. And then 2-3 months down the road it’s not even a thought in your head (or at least not 24/7) and you are on to the next item that takes all your time and energy. 

My point in telling you this is that even with all that apprehensiveness and angst, getting through that and achieving it puts another rung on the ladder of your success. You have grown in your ability just a little more.

That’s why it’s good to challenge yourself and get out of that comfortable place, because if you don’t, then how will you grow? Stretch that muscle. Get comfortable with being uncomfortable. 

That’s not something we like to hear, but what has ever happened that was so great while you were in your comfort zone? Not much.

There is a quote by Robert H. Schuller, “Tough Times Never Last, But Tough People Do!”. That software problem I was getting through didn’t last, but I did. And that’s what I want for you.

Mindset matters. Make up your mind that you will figure out your situation and you aren’t going to give up. No phoning it in.

Here are five ways to tackle your problem instead of festering about it in your head.

1 – Write down all the possible solutions as a starting point. Pick one and map out a strategy. It’s easy to pick from a list than nothing at all.

2 – Understand the worse possible scenario and strategize what to do if it happens. If something does go wrong, you have a plan.

3 – Focus on what you can change. No need to worry about something if you can’t fix or solve it.

4 – Start on one of the solutions bite by bite. As you work on it,  other solutions or creative ways will come to mind.

5 – Ask for Help! This is the hardest part for me. Asking for help is not a sign of weakness even though that’s usually the first thought in our head. But if you have exhausted yourself and your current resources, seek guidance. 

Life is going to throw you into unexpected and uncomfortable situations. But it’s how you react and handle it that will propel you through life. It’s not just about you, but once you get through something, you have the experience to help someone else who could be going through a similar situation. 

This doesn’t only have to be on the job but can relate to relationships, personal health issues, family matters, etc. 

Don’t run away from the hard times, but find the joy in the journey.

Interested in more ways to find inner peace, check out my article about finding balance in your life.

The post Resilience: 5 Reliable Ways to Get thru Scary Times first appeared on Angela P. Banks.

• The feeling of being Out of Control/Balance
• Step Back
• Get a Routine or Change it
• Move
• Sleep
• Change What You Eat
• Change Your Environment
• DeClutter
• Summary
• Resources

The feeling of being Out of Control/Balance

Is this you? Feeling like you are in a rut, doing the same thing day in and day out, feeling irritated, never enough time, family and work getting on your nerves? You may be feeling out of control of your life, or feeling like your life is off balance. In this article, you will learn 7 ways to take back control and why making these changes (whether big or small), will enhance your life balance and those around you.

Step Back

It’s okay, not to be okay. So take a Pause. If you have lost the balance in your life, now is the time to Stop and Step back.

If you are saying you don’t have enough time to step back, then you could be setting yourself up for a rude awakening. Your body will make you stop if you don’t take the time to reassess your lifestyle.

What is going on in your current situation now that you have taken this moment to step back? Are you grieving the loss of a loved one? Laid off from a job or going to a job you despise? Fighting constantly with family? There could be any number of reasons you feel this way and one of the first steps is to understand what is happening in your current situation. 

Let’s map out your day-to-day routine. Write out what basically happens in a day. Most of us typically follow the same schedule but just think about what happens specifically to you and what you have to do for others. 

Which areas or items get under your skin? And please don’t say other people! Even though they could play a factor, you can’t change other people (especially adults). You can only change what you do and how you react to situations.

Got it written down? No need to share your list with others, this is for you. This is a way to get all that has been trapped in your mind down on pen and paper (or digitally if you so choose).

Get a Routine or Change it

There are benefits to having a structure in your life. There is less ambiguity, and less to think about which gives you more mental capacity to tackle more strenuous areas of your life. 

For example, taking out the stress of figuring out what to eat by planning 4-5 days worth of meals will lessen your anxiety level of the big “what are we going to eat” question. 

When you have a routine, you also can accept or reject outside requests for your time because you know exactly what you have time for. If you have a group fitness class 3 times a week, you know you are committed during that time and can easily reject an invitation without having to feel the guilt of saying No.

You don’t have to have every single minute planned out. Doing that can be exhausting by itself. However, start with a morning routine. The way your start your day plays a lot into how the rest of your day will go. If you start out with chaos, it will get worse as the day goes on.

Check out The Miracle Morning on ways to transform your morning routine and bring positive change in your life. And while you are at it, sip some lemon water before breaking into that coffee.

But let’s set you already have a routine or a structure to your day/week. Maybe it’s a little too rigid or you have been doing the same thing for the last 10 years and it’s more out of habit or obligation.

Are you the person that can’t say “No” to anyone or any project? Have you been on the same committee of a local group or just going through the motions?

Every other Monday at 7pm, you have to drive across town for a pointless 2-hour meeting that doesn’t accomplish anything that couldn’t be done over an email. If that is you, and you’re tired of it but keep forging ahead, it may be time for your to shake your routine up. 

Doing something brand new or stopping some of the old habits will bring a new spark into your life. Give yourself something new to look forward to. How do you feel when you have a new trip scheduled and it’s almost time to go? Your whole attitude changes. 

But you can’t go on a new trip (or maybe you can), every week so what else can you do to switch up your routine. If it no longer brings you joy and just the thought of doing a task irritates you, it’s time to let it go. Not sure how to do that? Check out The Power of No. It will provide great insight into the best way forward. 

Move

You’ve heard it all before. Daily exercise helps generate endorphins, which basically makes you feel good. But nobody said you needed to do hard-core CrossFit or train for a marathon. Just some regular walking is a great start. And the older you get, the better the walking will feel as opposed to the strenuous workouts.

Work your way up to several times a week for 20-30 mins each time. Another great workout is incorporating yoga into your routine. The flexibility you will gain will make other workouts you decide to try easier. 

Any movement, whether you like walking, yoga, boxing, or swimming (just to name a few) will give you the energy to take control of your life. Physical activity promotes brain health. 

Why care about brain health? Because brain health helps people thrive within the context of their personal life. And if we put two and two together, low brain health is a factor in why your life is out of balance.

Sleep

There is a saying, “I can sleep when I’m dead” that too many people in our world live by especially if they are trying to build businesses or they feel there is too much going on in their world to afford the luxury of sleep.

Don’t let that saying ruin how you get balance in your life. It’s likely why you feel out of sorts. How much sleep you need is different for everyone, but you still need to try and stay consistent with what that number is. 

So why is sleep so important? You’ve heard how it can repair your body and gives you the energy needed for the next day right? But how does this pertain to maintaining balance in your life? With good sleep, you can problem-solve and make better decisions in your life.

The decisions we make can have lasting effects. 

Remember that Cosby episode when Clare was so exhausted that she signed a rental agreement for Theo without even reading it (and she was the lawyer)? A few seconds later she realized what she did and had to rectify the situation.

Ever put on two different pairs of shoes or two different socks and then realize a few hours later they aren’t matching? Well, this example may not be as detrimental to you but signing something and not being fully coherent when reading an important document is. 

If you like to stay up late, try to get in at least 7 hours before you do something the next day. Find a schedule that works for you and be consistent. Also, try reading before bed instead of browsing your phone before you go to sleep. You’ll feel better rested the next day? Don’t believe it, try and find out.

Change what you eat

You are what you eat. Remember that saying? This can be a sticky subject as in some parts of the world, access to food is not as easy as just going 5 mins away to a fully stocked grocery store. And with the way food costs are rising, sometimes the cheapest items are not the best for you.

But what do you do? Do the best you can. When you know better you do better. 

How many times a week are you eating Fast Food? The food served is convenient, but 9 times out of 10, it’s not providing the nutritional value you need to be as productive as you can be.

I mean when they advertise 2 for $5 and then put the great marketing commercials out there, it’s tough to just ignore.

But you can when you realize that the foods you are eating could make you feel out of control of your life.

When you feel anxious and depressed, take inventory of what foods you have been eating. Go ahead, write it down. It’s probably a mix of fried food, red meats, processed foods like microwave dinners, cookies, caffeinated drinks, and alcoholic beverages.

Eating foods such as processed meats, high sugar foods, caffeine, and alcohol, which provide little nutritional value, have been associated with more psychiatric symptoms and can increase cortisol levels—our primary hormone responsible for stress.

I’m not saying you have to be 100% clean eating all the time, but do you need to have a soft drink for every meal? (And diet drinks are just as bad).

Clean eating is not as hard as we make it. Especially if done in stages. Start with what you drink in the morning. Water and lemon versus coffee. Fruit versus a danish. Making your own sandwich with fresh vegetables instead of grabbing a burger and fries.

Take it one day at a time and you’ll see the difference which how you feel daily.

Change your environment

How long have you been where you currently live? 5 years, 10 years, your whole life? There is certainly nothing wrong with staying in one place for an extended period of time. However, if your attitude has been off and you can’t figure out why then you may want to look at your environment. 

Do you feel sick every Sunday night because you have to go to the office the next day? Or every time you go somewhere there is drama mainly because the locals have nothing better to do in your small community. 

Feeling this way, day in and day out does not help you mentally and physically. You can change what you see and where you live. 

Maybe move to the other side of town if you can’t at the moment leave your current area. Or finding a new position within the same company. However, the more drastic the change, the more drastic the change will happen within you.

Moving away opens up more opportunities. You get a chance to expand your social and business network in addition to having that “starting over” point. No one knows your history so you can improve yourself without someone from your past always bringing up the past.

Changing your environment can also increase your dopamine levels. What is dopamine? 

What is dopamine? Dopamine is made in your brain and acts as a chemical messenger, communicating messages between nerve cells in your brain and your brain and the rest of your body. 

New experiences increase your dopamine level. Why is that important? Because high levels of dopamine can produce a greater sense of self-control, and increase productivity, and motivation. 

Think of it as a kick in the pants to get you back on track in your life.

DeClutter

Maybe a fresh start does not mean a new home but instead cleaning out your current home. It could be time to remove the negative energy in your space. 

To make room for the new, you have to get rid of the old. Somehow the world just works that way. 

Do you have just random junk in your house for no apparent reason other than it’s just always been there? Why though? This extra stuff in your house and space could be holding you back from something greater. When you have a clear space to work and think, typically your work reflects that versus your brain getting overwhelmed with everything it sees.

There is a great book by Mari Kondo called The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up. This book will help you change your home into a space of serenity and inspiration. 

Clutter harms your mental health so removing the clutter will improve this part of your life. How do you feel when you come home to a house that is clean and full of zen versus when you go into a house where you can barely walk without tripping over something? 

Go ahead, take one room at a time as this type of task can be very tiring, but also very rewarding. How would you feel by giving away stuff you no longer need and use, to people that can use it? There is a good feeling that comes with that too. 

Use this as a catalyst to find the balance in your life to start achieving the goals that you set forth.

Summary

As you review this list, start with 1 or 2 areas to prepare for a balanced life. These changes can produce a better work life balance, healthy boundaries, and personal growth. Don’t let burnout of life take you down. Carve out some personal time and focus on getting the balance set in your life.

Don’t wait, start today!

Resources

Olsson, R. (2021,September 21).Can Certain Foods Increase Stress and Anxiety?[Blog post]. Retrieved from https://www.bannerhealth.com/healthcareblog/better-me/can-certain-foods-increase-stress-and-anxiety 

Mental Health Daily (2015, April 1). High Dopamine Levels: Symptoms & Adverse Reactions [Blog post]. Retrieved from https://mentalhealthdaily.com/2015/04/01/high-dopamine-levels-symptoms-adverse-reactions

Cleveland Clinic (2022, December 25). Dopamine: What is it, Function & Symptoms [Blog post]. Retrieved from https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/articles/22581-dopamine

The post 7 Ways to Find Balance in your Life first appeared on Angela P. Banks.

1. Married or getting married
2. A parent or about to become one
3. Homeowner
4. Changing Jobs
5. Retired or planning for retirement
6. Single

The post Life Insurance first appeared on Angela P. Banks.